Bad Run - New Focus

Yesterday I had a bad run.  Went the the US National Whitewater Center in Charlotte to run their trails - of which there are approximately 14 miles of single track rolling trails.  Expecting to do all 14, I cut it short after only 8 miles.  Why?  It could be that I did a hill workout the day before AND another Zumba class.  So my legs may have been shot.  Trying to learn to run while tired - because that is how it will be in Colorado in 4 months - back-to-back long, hilly runs over 6 days.  It could be that I wasn't mentally strong to push through the tiredness.  Or it could be that there were about 300 women with me there (that's a story for another blog - day wasn't a loss after all!).

But no matter the reason - I felt disgusted with myself.  The week of workouts had been wonderful up to that point.  Nearly 30 miles already in, my Zumba workout - with about 60 women (that's a story for another blog - that day wasn't a loss either!), and feeling good that I was getting stronger by the day.

On my car ride home from the Whitewater center - I was contemplating what did I get myself into thinking that 113 miles was doable.  These were little hills, not very steep inclines, and a beautiful wooded setting.  It would only be magnified in Colorado.  It was at that moment that I looked down at my wrist and it hit me.  I had a purpose and I needed to get re-focused.  I saw my multi-colored bracelet resting there.  You know them - you see them all the time on people - as they are worn for various causes.  Mine says KEIYH (Keep Emmah In Your Heart).  I started thinking about Emmah and the struggles she had for over 4 years.  She was up and down, just like the trails.  She fought the tough fight and never gave up, believing that she would come out on the other side of cancer strong.

I let that realization set in, and tried to turn my frustration with the day into a positive.  Rather than going home and calling it a day, I instead drove to a local school with a track and put in three more miles.  Sure I was tired, and I was going slow, but I needed to show myself that even in those moments of frustration, there can be a positive and that I am capable of doing more.  And I need to do more.  I have people counting on me, and I don't want to disappoint myself.  The months ahead are going to be even more challenging as the weekly miles continue to grow in preparation for Colorado.

Today is a new today, and I know my training needs to include more core work, more cross-training, and greater commitment.  So while it is already 80 degrees outside and quite humid, I am heading out for another run - and with a focus that is stronger than ever.

Thanks Emmah for putting some things into perspective for me.  A subtle reminder from a bracelet about what heart is all about.

KEIYH